What Is Your Enough Factor City-to-City Tour Ends Tomorrow

It all comes down to this!  Tomorrow, April 29th, is the last tour stop in our city-to-city tour of "What Is Your Enough Factor?"  

So what happens after that?  Do we go back to life as usual?  I certainly hope not.  The choice is up to you.  You can get help or go back to life as usual.  If life as usual were preferred, you wouldn't be here now would you?    

Still, this seems to be the hardest step for high performing women.  They will spend hundreds of dollars on everything else, and justify it, but will continue to be powerless in their relationships with men.

Now, that's the head-scratcher.  If you discovered a valve in your heart wasn't working, would you spend money on a new car?  No, you'd go to a doctor--quick, fast and in a hurry.

The truth is

Settling is the elephant that gets fed every single time knowledge comes and is not acted upon.  Let me bring that elephant out of the shadows and into the light.  Besides, it's stinking up the room and doing a number (two) on your carpet.  It's:

• Thinking that the aha moments you had during the tour are enough
• Allowing your current mindset to accurately process this new information
• Excusing yourself from taking the next right step because you "can't afford it," you've got too much going on in your life right now, or any plausible explanation that keeps you in your comfort zone
• Avoiding the work, convincing yourself that meeting Mr. Right will fix it all

These four common responses are the poop your elephant has left all over your romantic life.  Awful!

Here's the deal.  If you want something different, you've got to do something different.  Get that elephant out of your house and go get that great love you deserve.

Here's how.  I invite you to enroll in my 4-week program.  (Now why would I send you somewhere else when I've brought you this far?) There's a special price for my Enough Factor women.  It's only for a limited time though.  You already know how badly you want your life to change.

My Two-Step Emotional Detox

My love journey required an emotional detox. Here's my two-step formula.

Step One:  Do an emotional cleanse.  

Pain doesn't just go away.  It simply goes into volcano posture.  At first it looks as if everything is fine.  There is no spewing.  No smoke.  Only an occasional gurgle.  What we don't understand is there is still activity.  The pain is still there.  Give it time and the right conditions and it will gush molten lava, burning up everything that it comes in contact with.  Relationships are destroyed by its cascade of destruction.

When you stop feeling the pain or meet a new man, it is easy to think that everything is okay.  How you feel throughout the progression is more telling.

Step Two:  Eat healthy.

Just as it is counterproductive to buy a greasy hamburger after a detox, it is counterproductive to feed yourself the same toxic diet of erroneous beliefs.  The way you challenge those beliefs and exorcise them from your body is to feed yourself by educating yourself.

Find out what healthy looks like in a man.  As I said in my previous post, Don't Give A Man A Paycheck He Didn't Earn, we women assume that giving demonstrates that we are "good women," wife material, a keeper.  Your girlfriends believe the same.  Here's the thing.  You aren't dating your girlfriends.  You are dating men.  Men see things completely different.  So, in order to be effective in your relationships with men, you need to know his language (how he communicates love and respect) and his culture (how he's wired).

Don't Let Fear Of Getting Hurt Hijack Your Self Value

As I continue my "What Is Your Enough Factor?" Tour, a recurring lament on the lips of many women is fear of getting hurt. "I don't want to get hurt again," I hear over and over again. That fear manifests in a lot of different ways (we discuss 10 of them during our workshop), but the way that is most lethal is low self value.

Women are so stuck in a mindset that hijacks their self value that they cannot move forward with their lives.  Some precipitating relationship event has them so intimidated that they take a step and rush right back to the comfort of their cells. It's not the fear that's the problem.   Fear is always present in our lives.  Fear has never stopped us from what we feel bound and determined to have.  What is the problem is seeing herself as less important than all the reasons she gives herself to stay locked up. That is what women should fear; for that is more dangerous than anything a man could ever do to them.

Stop serving what's over! 

I read somewhere that if what's in front of you is not more powerful than what's behind you, you will never move forward.  The jury has come back with a "not guilty," and the judge has acquitted you. All that's left is for you to leave the prison cell.  With that in mind, I have the car pulled around, ready to take you to your new destination.  My only question is what's that worth to you?  Once you answer that for yourself, you have put something more compelling in front of you.

My "What Is Your Enough Factor?" Tour is that very enticement.  It is to put something Bigger in front of you than what has held you captive for these months or even years.  It's something that makes freedom more desirable than remaining in a dank cell.  You are holding the key.  Unlock the door and come to one of our tour locations.  

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!

Two Ways To Get Your Heart Back

You probably read my previous post, I Left My Heart In San Francisco, and thought to yourself, How do I get my heart back?  (If you didn't, it's a good read).  Well, I heard you and have the answer.  It's a 2-step process:

• Own it.  You have to own the fact that you were a participant in whatever relationship drama, defect or arrangement.  Even more important though is owning the decision you made that had absolutely nothing to do with the man.  You see, you made the decision to defect on your heart.  Something made you walk away from your heart that had little to do with him and that, my dear sister, is what you have to own.
     
• Feel it.  This is so hard for us high performing women.  We know how to work at stuff but have a hard time allowing ourselves to feel.  We don't trust our feelings.  Somebody somewhere told us not to.  Strength was to stop crying, dry our eyes and get back to work.  This is the worst thing you can do for whatever you don't resolve sours in the stomach of your self image and self esteem.  Feeling it allows you to be a friend to yourself and to get curious about the feeling.  This my dear sister is the path to Wisdom.

Your heart was, is and will forever be yours.  So you can continue to leave it with someone who doesn't deserve it or you can grown woman up and do what you have to do to heal it.

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!

Have You Left Your Heart In San Francisco?

Regardless to whether it's San Francisco or Relationships Past, Anywhere USA, you need to go back and get your heart.  You know why?  It's your heart.  It was given to you for safe keeping.

Maybe you trusted it before it was mature enough to know the difference between Mr. Right or Mr. Wrong and you blamed it for the painful experience that left you broke, busted and disgusted.  I've been there.  Here's the thing though.  Your heart is the baby, not the bathwater.  If anything needs tossing or needs to be left in San Francisco or otherwise, it's being defined by what happened to you. What happened was merely an experience, a lesson, not the judge and jury sentencing your heart to a life in prison with no hope of parole.

So go and get your heart back.  Dust it off.  Give it a big hug.  And help it to become wiser.  What it needs to know isn't whether or not men can be trusted.  It needs to know that you can be trusted.

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!

Do You Have A Dating Personality?

The buzz word for dating nowadays is authenticity.  But what does that mean?  When you've been defined by your performance most of your life - as have I - it is hard to know where your personality ends and you begin.

Your dating personality is your representative. Your PR agent of sorts.  It's how you show up in your relationships.  Dr. Michelle Callahan, an expert fixture on the popular Tyra Banks Show during its 5 season run and author of one of the most insightful books I've ever read, Ms. Typed, identifies at least 10:

• Ms. Soul Mate
• Ms. Independent
• Ms. Perfect
• Ms. Anaconda
• Ms. Mom
• Ms. Sex Machine
• Ms. Rose Colored Glasses
• Ms. Second Place
• Ms. Bag Lady
• Ms. Drama Queen

I have concluded that fueling these dating personalities is one thing:  not knowing what your enough factor is.  Not knowing leaves you feeling insecure about yourself and about your relationships.  The real you is MIA (missing in action) and a man is left with your insecurity to deal with.  That's so not what he had in mind!

To learn what your enough factor is and how to relate authentically, I invite you to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and to follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS.

Until then, Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith...Not Insecurity!

Why You Should Act Like A Lady, But NOT Think Like A Man

One of my favorite books on relationships is Steve Harvey's ACT LIKE A LADY THINK LIKE A MAN.  In it, he takes us deep into the man cave. I mean deep.  You know the places where there are locks on the doors that only men have the codes to.  In fact, his wisdom about how men think helped me a lot in the early days of dating my husband.  That said, I have to challenge the notion that a woman should think like a man.

Here's why.  I've had a front row seat for several years at the evolution in the way men and women relate.  Without a doubt, women have always run things: the home, the children, their men.  So that's nothing new.  But their strength was their ability to influence.  Never have I seen women so aggressively ambitious (oftentimes emasculating men then calling them weak because "they can't handle a strong woman") as I have seen in this present day of dating and relationships.  Perhaps, it's because we've eaten the lie that we are less when we've always been more.

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!