What Is Your Enough Factor City-to-City Tour Ends Tomorrow

It all comes down to this!  Tomorrow, April 29th, is the last tour stop in our city-to-city tour of "What Is Your Enough Factor?"  

So what happens after that?  Do we go back to life as usual?  I certainly hope not.  The choice is up to you.  You can get help or go back to life as usual.  If life as usual were preferred, you wouldn't be here now would you?    

Still, this seems to be the hardest step for high performing women.  They will spend hundreds of dollars on everything else, and justify it, but will continue to be powerless in their relationships with men.

Now, that's the head-scratcher.  If you discovered a valve in your heart wasn't working, would you spend money on a new car?  No, you'd go to a doctor--quick, fast and in a hurry.

The truth is

Settling is the elephant that gets fed every single time knowledge comes and is not acted upon.  Let me bring that elephant out of the shadows and into the light.  Besides, it's stinking up the room and doing a number (two) on your carpet.  It's:

• Thinking that the aha moments you had during the tour are enough
• Allowing your current mindset to accurately process this new information
• Excusing yourself from taking the next right step because you "can't afford it," you've got too much going on in your life right now, or any plausible explanation that keeps you in your comfort zone
• Avoiding the work, convincing yourself that meeting Mr. Right will fix it all

These four common responses are the poop your elephant has left all over your romantic life.  Awful!

Here's the deal.  If you want something different, you've got to do something different.  Get that elephant out of your house and go get that great love you deserve.

Here's how.  I invite you to enroll in my 4-week program.  (Now why would I send you somewhere else when I've brought you this far?) There's a special price for my Enough Factor women.  It's only for a limited time though.  You already know how badly you want your life to change.

My Two-Step Emotional Detox

My love journey required an emotional detox. Here's my two-step formula.

Step One:  Do an emotional cleanse.  

Pain doesn't just go away.  It simply goes into volcano posture.  At first it looks as if everything is fine.  There is no spewing.  No smoke.  Only an occasional gurgle.  What we don't understand is there is still activity.  The pain is still there.  Give it time and the right conditions and it will gush molten lava, burning up everything that it comes in contact with.  Relationships are destroyed by its cascade of destruction.

When you stop feeling the pain or meet a new man, it is easy to think that everything is okay.  How you feel throughout the progression is more telling.

Step Two:  Eat healthy.

Just as it is counterproductive to buy a greasy hamburger after a detox, it is counterproductive to feed yourself the same toxic diet of erroneous beliefs.  The way you challenge those beliefs and exorcise them from your body is to feed yourself by educating yourself.

Find out what healthy looks like in a man.  As I said in my previous post, Don't Give A Man A Paycheck He Didn't Earn, we women assume that giving demonstrates that we are "good women," wife material, a keeper.  Your girlfriends believe the same.  Here's the thing.  You aren't dating your girlfriends.  You are dating men.  Men see things completely different.  So, in order to be effective in your relationships with men, you need to know his language (how he communicates love and respect) and his culture (how he's wired).

Don't Give A Man A Paycheck He Didn't Earn

After attending the Kick Off of "What Is Your Enough Factor?," one of the attendees posted a video of Mary J. Blige as she talks publicly about her heart-wrenching break up from her husband.  Check it out:

https://youtu.be/7T3eTnA9JMQ

Dr. John Gray, author of Men Are From Mars Women Are From Venus said this.  "Don't give a man a paycheck he didn't earn."  We women think "holding down" a man until he gets back on his feet or offering to cook him dinner when you're only one date in tells him you are a keeper.  Quite the contrary.  It tells him that for little effort, he can get your best.

A man doesn't deserve a paycheck for making you feel good.

My heart goes out to Mary, yes, but her's is a cautionary tale for any woman who is exchanging glances with another woman -- you know that knowing glance that says, "happened to me too."  I have to call bull shiggety on that!  Somewhere along the way somebody modeled for us that feelings of euphoria with a man earns him a big whopping paycheck.  It doesn't.

A man is not responsible for your heart.  I know that we women want to make him the culprit; but are you ready for some grown woman truth?  You had to betray you before he did.  Self betrayal is limping away from a break up without attending to what got broken.  That, he is not responsible for.

From the day Mary came on the scene, her songs were about one bad relationship after another.  For years, Mary's songs were the soundtrack for every lovelorn emotion.  As much as I love the mean (in a good way) beats and arrangements of her songs, the lyrics were the wailings of a tortured soul.   When you are begging a man to stay with you, something is broken inside of you that needs attention. It doesn't matter that she went through a transformation after getting married that landed her on Hollywood's Best Dressed List.  If you put lip stick on a pig, it is still a pig.  I'm not calling Mary a pig.  She is a beautiful and talented woman.  What I mean is no matter how you dress something up, the truth of what it is remains.  

To read more about my two-step emotional detox, click here.

A Man Who Treats You Right Is The New Sexy

If you don't know, you better ask somebody!  Gone are the days of falling for bad boys and fixer uppers.  For all their intensity and boyish charms, grown up women know that a man who treats you right puts them to shame.  When you understand that, it won't matter so much what package he comes in.  Whether his shoes match his outfit pales in comparison.  As one of my "What Is Your Enough Factor?" attendees said, "That's cosmetics.  That can be fixed."

So ladies, stop dismissing men because of cosmetics.  All diamonds start out in dirt and aren't even recognizable except to a trained eye.  When someone who knows diamonds finds one, that person is happy before it's refined and spit-shined.  Like diamonds or any precious stone, a person's true value is discovered and uncovered.  A man who treats you right is sexy as heck!!

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then, Fuel your Enough Factor with Faith!!

There's A Duality to Life! There's A Duality to Love!

Have you ever gotten bad news and good news on the same day?  You can get a distress call and immediately drop to your knees.  And before you can gather yourself, you get good news that makes you want to jump up and down.  Life is filled with dualities just like this.

Love is the same.  On the heels of an unexpected break up, you can walk into a coffee shop and meet the man who is your life partner.  Martha Beck, whose writings have brought such revelation to my life over the years, wrote an article that points out the new babies born out of endings.  Have you noticed them?  Many of us don't notice until they get up some size.

As devastating as it was, the end of my marriage released little bundles of joy into my life that would grow up to be recovery of my soul, business ownership, and finding true love.  As painful as the ending was, these babies would not have been born otherwise.

Things might be tough right now.  Your heart might be broken.  Still, I encourage you to notice the positive things that start off as specks that grow up into something beautiful.

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel your Enough Factor with Faith!!

Straight Wives Matter

Every first Sunday, I have the pleasure of cohosting the Straight Wives Radio Show with Gay Husband Expert, Bonnie Kaye.  Recently, she shared with me and her listeners an initiative she's starting called Straight Wives Matter.

Now for those who don't know that much about gay husbands and straight wives, it might seem like an oxymoronic misprint.  Why would a person who is gay seek an intimate partnership with someone who is not?  That's a great question.  Just the same, it happens everyday.  In fact, by Bonnie's estimate, "there are 4 million women in this country and millions more around the world who find themselves unknowingly married to a gay or bisexual man."

Straight Wives are an endangered species!

Women full of promise with lots of love to give have been duped into lives undeserving of them time and time again by men who have decided their deterioration is worth the cover story they wished to present to the world.  Then, when they decide to come out of the closet, they are celebrated; but their wives and children are forgotten.   Even in the dissolution of the marriage, the most a woman can state as the reason for the marriage ending is "irreconcilable differences."  A gross under representation of what actually destroyed the marriage, wouldn't you say?

Do you, Boo; just don't do me!

Don't misunderstand.  I believe that men and women should live and love as they choose.  And I have no problem with gay rights, gay pride, gay marriage and the fight for equality in the legal system. What does cause me pause however is the blatant disregard of the spouses and children who are left behind, whose quality of life is blown to smithereens and neither the Straight nor Gay communities seem to care.

If Straight Wives Matter to you, I invite you to contact Bonnie at her Gay Husbands, Straight Wives website or email her at bonkaye@aol.com.  You see, when I had nobody to fully understand what I went through as a Straight Wife, Bonnie did.  I wouldn't be where I am today, married to a loving straight man and empowering women with a message that true love is possible, had I not mattered to her.

Don't Let Fear Of Getting Hurt Hijack Your Self Value

As I continue my "What Is Your Enough Factor?" Tour, a recurring lament on the lips of many women is fear of getting hurt. "I don't want to get hurt again," I hear over and over again. That fear manifests in a lot of different ways (we discuss 10 of them during our workshop), but the way that is most lethal is low self value.

Women are so stuck in a mindset that hijacks their self value that they cannot move forward with their lives.  Some precipitating relationship event has them so intimidated that they take a step and rush right back to the comfort of their cells. It's not the fear that's the problem.   Fear is always present in our lives.  Fear has never stopped us from what we feel bound and determined to have.  What is the problem is seeing herself as less important than all the reasons she gives herself to stay locked up. That is what women should fear; for that is more dangerous than anything a man could ever do to them.

Stop serving what's over! 

I read somewhere that if what's in front of you is not more powerful than what's behind you, you will never move forward.  The jury has come back with a "not guilty," and the judge has acquitted you. All that's left is for you to leave the prison cell.  With that in mind, I have the car pulled around, ready to take you to your new destination.  My only question is what's that worth to you?  Once you answer that for yourself, you have put something more compelling in front of you.

My "What Is Your Enough Factor?" Tour is that very enticement.  It is to put something Bigger in front of you than what has held you captive for these months or even years.  It's something that makes freedom more desirable than remaining in a dank cell.  You are holding the key.  Unlock the door and come to one of our tour locations.  

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!

Two Ways To Get Your Heart Back

You probably read my previous post, I Left My Heart In San Francisco, and thought to yourself, How do I get my heart back?  (If you didn't, it's a good read).  Well, I heard you and have the answer.  It's a 2-step process:

• Own it.  You have to own the fact that you were a participant in whatever relationship drama, defect or arrangement.  Even more important though is owning the decision you made that had absolutely nothing to do with the man.  You see, you made the decision to defect on your heart.  Something made you walk away from your heart that had little to do with him and that, my dear sister, is what you have to own.
     
• Feel it.  This is so hard for us high performing women.  We know how to work at stuff but have a hard time allowing ourselves to feel.  We don't trust our feelings.  Somebody somewhere told us not to.  Strength was to stop crying, dry our eyes and get back to work.  This is the worst thing you can do for whatever you don't resolve sours in the stomach of your self image and self esteem.  Feeling it allows you to be a friend to yourself and to get curious about the feeling.  This my dear sister is the path to Wisdom.

Your heart was, is and will forever be yours.  So you can continue to leave it with someone who doesn't deserve it or you can grown woman up and do what you have to do to heal it.

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!

Have You Left Your Heart In San Francisco?

Regardless to whether it's San Francisco or Relationships Past, Anywhere USA, you need to go back and get your heart.  You know why?  It's your heart.  It was given to you for safe keeping.

Maybe you trusted it before it was mature enough to know the difference between Mr. Right or Mr. Wrong and you blamed it for the painful experience that left you broke, busted and disgusted.  I've been there.  Here's the thing though.  Your heart is the baby, not the bathwater.  If anything needs tossing or needs to be left in San Francisco or otherwise, it's being defined by what happened to you. What happened was merely an experience, a lesson, not the judge and jury sentencing your heart to a life in prison with no hope of parole.

So go and get your heart back.  Dust it off.  Give it a big hug.  And help it to become wiser.  What it needs to know isn't whether or not men can be trusted.  It needs to know that you can be trusted.

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!

Do You Have A Dating Personality?

The buzz word for dating nowadays is authenticity.  But what does that mean?  When you've been defined by your performance most of your life - as have I - it is hard to know where your personality ends and you begin.

Your dating personality is your representative. Your PR agent of sorts.  It's how you show up in your relationships.  Dr. Michelle Callahan, an expert fixture on the popular Tyra Banks Show during its 5 season run and author of one of the most insightful books I've ever read, Ms. Typed, identifies at least 10:

• Ms. Soul Mate
• Ms. Independent
• Ms. Perfect
• Ms. Anaconda
• Ms. Mom
• Ms. Sex Machine
• Ms. Rose Colored Glasses
• Ms. Second Place
• Ms. Bag Lady
• Ms. Drama Queen

I have concluded that fueling these dating personalities is one thing:  not knowing what your enough factor is.  Not knowing leaves you feeling insecure about yourself and about your relationships.  The real you is MIA (missing in action) and a man is left with your insecurity to deal with.  That's so not what he had in mind!

To learn what your enough factor is and how to relate authentically, I invite you to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and to follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS.

Until then, Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith...Not Insecurity!

When Is The Right Time To Have "The Talk" With A Man

Although women want to know where they stand from the beginning with a man, we struggle with when we should ask.  As a result, many a woman finds her voice, her value and her vision for the relationship have all been compromised.  So when is the right time to have "the talk" with a man?  I'm going to answer that question with a more important one.  When is the right time to know what your intentions are?

We women play games with ourselves sometimes.  We tell ourselves that there is no harm.  We tell ourselves that we can handle it. We tell ourselves that if things don't work, we can get out.  All of this is right in theory only; not often in practice. Think about it. You are the one who stands to win or to lose. This is why it is important that a woman be certain of her own feelings, her own needs and where she is at this time in her life. Sometimes, like Iyanla Vanzant, she discovers that what she thought she wanted, she really doesn't at all.  

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!

What Grown Women Know About Break Ups That Bitter Women Will Never Know

A divorce or break up can be devastating.  What you entered into with hope and commitment crumbles right before your eyes and there is nothing you can do about it.  Sometimes, this leaves women shaken especially in their confidence, making it hard to trust a new man.

What grown women know about break ups is all relationships end.  Some relationships end because someone wants out. Others because someone dies.  In either case, there is an expiration date on relationships.  This, grown women know. When women understand this, it makes it easier to move on. Though it hurt very badly, was very disappointing, was a betrayal of epic proportions or required a couple of rounds with the Stages of Grief, she understands that she owns no one.  Sometimes things swing in her favor and sometimes they don't.  While none of that is in her control, one thing is.  She can choose healing over bitterness.  She can take back her heart back and make sure it gets the healing that it needs.

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!

How to Know If He's Mr. Right

There is no iron clad formula for figuring out if a man is Mr. Right.  But this is who he is not.  He is not someone you've got to impress or accommodate or adjust to.  He is not someone who makes you feel like he likes the idea of you better than he likes you.  Whether right feels like a man who asks you to dance or the man who brings you soup when you tell him that you don't feel well, there is something in your emotional DNA that knows that special kind of easy breeziness of your Mr. Right.

So keep your eyes and heart open.  Tune into the sound of your own music and do your own math.  If his sound doesn't resonate with yours and something simply doesn't add up, trust what your Wise Self knows.

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!

How to Change Your Man's Mind About These Three Words: Can We Talk

Say the words, "Can we talk," and your man's whole disposition changes.  Why is that?  "It normally means I've done something wrong," a man will tell you.  But what if those words didn't mean that?  

Someone once said that men are motivated by reward. Suppose you made his experience of "can we talk," rewarding? Maybe he wouldn't hate it.  I look at it as similar to communication between parents and their kids.  Studies show that if they talk about a whole lot of nothing, it is much easier to talk when it matters.  Perhaps this applies to conversations between lovers too.  Try it.  Try surprising your man by asking him,"Can we talk?" Then talk about something worthy of conversation and invite his input.  Men love to solve problems and be the hero.  You can create that experience for him.  Know this though.  In order to change his mind you're going to have to do it more than once.  Tell me how it goes.

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!

Does The Man You're Dating Make You Feel Like He's Waiting For Someone Else To Show Up?

Have you ever gone out with a guy and though he was super polite and very complimentary, he seemed easily distracted, eyes looking away as if he were waiting for someone else to show up?  That use to leave me feeling puzzled until a guy friend of mine let me in on a secret.  "He's not sure you're the one, so he wants to keep his options open," my guy friend told me.

So what's a woman to do?  Just sit around and wait for the man to make his mind up? No!  It's time to roll up your sleeves and go into keeper mode.  At least that's what many women think. In my best Dr. Phil voice, however, I have to ask, "How is that working for ya?" Just because he's enjoying what he's getting does not mean the pendulum is swinging in your favor.  I suggest a second option.  Give him some space and go on about your full and joyous life. This I know for sure. He will figure things out much quicker and you won't feel stuck while he does.

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!

5 Signs You Might Be An Attention Junkie

He shows up to your house on time with a bouquet of flowers. He helps you with your coat and holds open the door as you exit.  He hurries to open the car door and off you go on your first date. That's the way an ideal date goes in your head.  So why isn't that your real life experience with dating? If the allure is at least he's paying attention--nobody else is-- then you might just be an attention junkie.

Here are 5 signs:

• You get angry when a guy takes your number and doesn't call as soon as you think he should.  Then when he does, you have to hide how upset you are.  
• If a man has to break a date because something came up unexpectedly.  You pretend to understand but deep down you fear he's seeing someone else or isn't interested.
• You crave the attention more than anything and will give his character defects a pass as long as he gives you the attention.
• You do things completely out of character so you won't lose his attention.  You keep his dog and you don't even like dogs.  You change the way you dress because he likes it and it doesn't even remotely look like you.  You'll even downplay your own needs to accommodate his.
• If there is a period where he's not as attentive and your efforts to regain his attention don't work, you experience a great deal of emotional discomfort almost to the point of desperation.  Like an addict going through withdrawal, you need to get that fix of attention.  

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!

What High Performing Need Not Wear On A Date

When a man asks you out, one piece of clothing you need not wear on a date is your work.  While he welcomes hearing about how much you love what you do, a good man is interested in spending time with you not the job.  This is especially difficult for high performing women who tend to throw on that familiar work jacket especially when they are anxious or intimidated.
 
To help you shift from work you to grown and sexy you, here is my suggestion.  If you are meeting him after work, have an outfit that can easily transition from work to evening by removing the jacket and exposing your lovely neckline.  Loosen your hair or muss it up a little. And this might sound a little silly but trust me on this.  Put on some music and dance around bare footed before you meet him.  I promise you, you'll bring a lovely energy to the date.  When you get nervous or catch yourself tensing up, call on that woman who was dancing just moments before.  

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!

How to Be Open Without Closing The Door on Your Standards

Read a blog about relationships and sandwiched in the 10 Steps To A This or How To Do That is this statement, "Be open." What does that mean? How do you stay open without closing the door on your standards?  How do you not cross the line?

It's simple music and math, I think.  The music is your voice. It's what you want deep down.  The melody in your soul.  The math is your value. It's the value you place on what you want. When there are inequities, it means you either aren't sure of what you want or you don't know for sure that what you are doing will get you what you want. In order to be open without closing the door on your standards, you have to be sure. Completely committed to your voice and your value.  That is what keeps you accountable to your vision.

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!

Two Common Mistakes Divorced Women Make When They Start Dating Again

Doesn't matter whether she got divorced today or has been for a few years now, there are two common mistakes that divorced women make when they start dating again.

• The first mistake is going into details about her ex.  Just because a man asks about your past relationship doesn't mean he wants to know every single sorted detail.  As she goes on and on with her never-ending story, you can see the blood slowly leave his face.  When you are tempted to give too much detail too soon, remember this.  Less is more.  While he might be curious, decide how much to tell and how much to keep.  Brené Brown says it best.  "People have to earn the right to hear your story."
  
• The second mistake is cooking for a man after the first date.  I call it the Rush to Booville. I've seen it over and over again.  The woman thinks that by inviting the man over she is being considerate and showing him that she is a keeper.  Especially with divorced women, there is a unconscious need to fill that vacant husband spot.  Consequently, men don't see it that way. They see it as, "Oh, I don't have to work no more," grab the remote and put his feet up.  This is not the outcome she wanted.  So here's my advice.  Rather than jump the gun, let him date you. Men respect what they work for.  

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!

How To Flirt Without Saying A Word

Some think that flirting is a lost art.  Well, it's not. In fact, when we are teenagers, flirting comes naturally.  Young girls are very in touch with their feminine side.  When we get a few years and a few relationship mishaps under our belt, we lose what once came so naturally.  Don't worry.  It's just like riding a bike. Once you've learned, you never forget.  With some practice, you can get it all back without trouble.

The key is tapping back into your feminine energy.  No matter how much pressure you get from the workplace and the demands of day-to-day life or how many people forego their pure femininity to go full on sexy, it's still there.  All you have to do is think about how it feels to be in love.  It all comes back. Remember that feeling? Just the thought made the light return to your eyes.  When you talked about him, there was a girliness that came from inside you.  It was in the way you looked at him and the look you got when you talked about him.  In fact, next time a man looks at you, I want you to channel that energy (if you think he's attractive, of course).  Look up at him for about 3 seconds, smile, drop your eyes then look back up.  Trust me, after you do that, your inner flirt will take it the rest of the way.

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!

Why Having Too Much Chemistry Can Kill A Budding Romance

Ask most daters what they are looking for when they meet the opposite sex for the first time and they'll tell you chemistry. Here's why a lot of chemistry kills a budding romance.

Chemistry is like fire.  If the fire is contained, it brings warmth and comfort.  If the fire is not, it can destroy everything!  By the same token, a lot of chemistry might give you both a rush.  But what do you have afterwards?  For men, it leaves little motivation to continue. This is a big surprise for women who can't figure out why he hasn't called them back or wonder what could have caused him to lose interest.  Unlike it is for men, for a woman, it is what makes her want more. She can't wait for him to call her again and she tells her friends that they made a real connection. I thought the same and then I talked with Dr. John Gray, author of MEN ARE FROM MARS WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS.  What he said made so much sense.  He explained the chemical affects on getting flooded with dopamine, the pleasure hormone, too soon in a relationship.  To keep that from happening, he suggests that you take things slow.  By doing so, you can maintain just enough pleasure to keep you both interested while increasing the likelihood of building something real.

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!

What Good Men Really Think About A Woman Making The First Move

If you are waiting for the man to make the first move, you might want to think again.  Good men have weighed in and what they have to say might surprise you.

While they agree that men are hunters, it doesn't mean that they like the risk of getting rejected by women.  In fact, good men like it when a woman asserts herself. Different from the aggressive woman who tries to take a page from a man's play book, the savvy grown woman knows how to give him the red light without breaking a sweat. Because she understands how men think and she knows her power, she sends invitations that are subtle and sexy.  It's a toss of her hair. It's a flirty smile.  It's walking away from the group she's with to give him clear access.  She does it with such class that no one else is any the wiser.

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!

Did You Know That A Man Can Tell A Lot About You Just By The Way You Walk?

While Professor Mehrabian's often quoted and misquoted 7% rule is debatable, one thing you cannot deny.  Men read your body language before you even open your mouth.  In fact, he relies on it.  With one glance, he gets the cue that you're interested.  With another, that you're not.  The same is true about your walk.

What does your walk tell a man about you?  If he detects a musicality to your gait as if you're listening to your favorite song or are just happy with life, he takes away that you are approachable.  He sees a possible opening for him to interact with you.  On the other hand, if you're looking down and your Prada pumps are pounding the sidewalk with abject resolve, he gets the message, "Not interested. In a hurry.  Buzz off."  Rather than risk it, he's going to trust the wisdom of Shakira: The hips don't lie.

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!

Why Friends With Benefits Make The Best Relationship Partners

Doesn't matter who came up with Friends With Benefits and the definition they gave it, the truth is Friends With Benefits make the best relationship partners. Before you write me off as a misogynist and demand my feminist card, let me explain.

By definition, a friend is someone we know and have an abiding affection for, right.  So building a strong friendship with the man you're interested in is a good thing.  But what about the word benefits. Let's take a look.  Contrary to the label, a benefit, put simply, is an advantage. In fact, benefit means to receive an advantage, profit or gain.  When you go out on a date with someone, you want to know what they have to offer else what's the point. So, how about ditching the label and build yourself a strong Friends With Benefits relationship.  Just make sure both of you are benefiting

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!

Why You Should Act Like A Lady, But NOT Think Like A Man

One of my favorite books on relationships is Steve Harvey's ACT LIKE A LADY THINK LIKE A MAN.  In it, he takes us deep into the man cave. I mean deep.  You know the places where there are locks on the doors that only men have the codes to.  In fact, his wisdom about how men think helped me a lot in the early days of dating my husband.  That said, I have to challenge the notion that a woman should think like a man.

Here's why.  I've had a front row seat for several years at the evolution in the way men and women relate.  Without a doubt, women have always run things: the home, the children, their men.  So that's nothing new.  But their strength was their ability to influence.  Never have I seen women so aggressively ambitious (oftentimes emasculating men then calling them weak because "they can't handle a strong woman") as I have seen in this present day of dating and relationships.  Perhaps, it's because we've eaten the lie that we are less when we've always been more.

For more hot tips just like this, be sure to catch one of our upcoming tour dates at a city near you at www.suzettesolutions.com/enough-factor and follow us on Facebook at #EnoughFactor #LIDS. Until then Fuel Your Enough Factor with Faith!!